What. A. Week. After not seeing each other since November for a number of reasons, Monday had been date day with the Cowboy, only that he had to cancel due to attending hospital with an ‘allergic reaction’ (no joke). After dutifully texting me regularly the previous weeks, he went back to his silent routine and eventually on Friday, things came to a head yet again.
Let’s address the inbetween first however. On Tuesday, I went for afternoon tea at Podium, the restaurant at the Hilton on Park Lane and it was absolutely fabulous. A chocolate chip scone with salted butter ganache was just what the doctor ordered. It was a birthday treat for a good friend of mine and we followed it up by a visit to the Sky Garden. We both had never been and the views are really spectacular.
The rest of the week just plodded along with the beginning of a massive clear out as in the five years in our house we have accumulated incredible amounts of random stuff. I think I might get banned from the local recycling centre soon.
Fast forward to Friday. Cowboy and me wanted to play the week by ear with a view to meeting up then if he was better. But my asks about his well being were ignored until I finally asked him Friday evening if we should call it a day as I just had had enough. I’m not bloody Rapunzel waiting in some tower. Unsurprisingly, it was all too much for him again and he said yes, let’s split. I wasn’t even particularly shocked or surprised. The one thing I asked though that, after two years of seeing each other, he would have the decency to sit down in a pub with me and tell me to my face why it was better to not see each other anymore. Like a grownup. Like a man. As it turned out he is neither.
Saturday morning had begun with him assuring me he still loved me, telling me how lovely I was and he was just not in a position to be in a relationship or be able to give me anything back which I deserved so much and how much guilt he felt about all that. Then I asked him about his ‘friend’. And it all changed. He got angry and insulting.
I thought about how to handle this all night Saturday. I did still believe him she was just his friend, but I also had to make sure there was just no going back for us this time. I could not do this a third time and I know myself well enough that I would have fallen into the same routine again. So I decided to send her a message, briefly explaining who I was and asked her to look out for him as he wasn’t in a good place right now. I knew he wouldn’t forgive me this intrusion into his personal life and that was what I needed to ensure our ties remained severed forever.
To cut this story short while it is still unfolding, she was not his friend but rather his girlfriend of the past seven years.